Mourinho lashes out at Madrid press: "They'll kill you."

This is by far the best quote yet from Mourinho since arriving at Real Madrid. In an interview with GolTV, Mourinho exclaimed:

"I think that Real Madrid cannot have a coach with no track record. Right now there is a coach in place with 2 Champions Leagues...championships in different countries including league cups and 17 championships. Then I arrive here and create so much doubt [among the press], that if you are a title-less manager coming to manage [Madrid], they'll kill you"

Just brilliant. First of all, how many people out there can pull off talking in the third person with such arrogance and grace better than this guy? And for all the soundbites that come out of his mouth, this one really hits out at the Madrid base more than others.  

If God managed Real Madrid but couldn't produce the spectacular, he'd be crucified. Other than owning Liverpool, managing Madrid is the most futile and nonsensical job a person can have in football. But at the moment, Madrid have the BEST manager in the world at the helm. A guy who craved Real Madrid as a dream job.


So get off his ass. This is as good as it gets.

Mourinho Claims Ronaldo Doesn't Dive. Um....

There is really nothing more sublime and entertaining than a José Mourinho interview. Arrogant, confident, and blunt, Mourinho will tell you everything on his mind in the most straight forward manner possible. He'll answer your question, and follow it up with the unthinkable. Speaking at the conclusion of the annual "Elite Club Coaches' Forum" in Nyon, Switzerland, José defended his prima donna superstar:

"Cristiano is a player who doesn't come from a culture of simulation."

That is correct. One can't possibly make a practical argument that Portuguese players don't dive. It's insane! After all, their neighbors in Spain are rampant cheaters, and the Italians have crafted a wonderful culture of deceit. Yet in Portugal, a metaphorical wall has been erected to defend against this culture of cheating the game by faking injury...Caution the authorities because I think someone broke through the defenses: Exhibit A.

"In some cases the simulators are those that have more protection, and those that are honest many times are the ones who get hurt."

Is he trying to tell us that divers should continue to dive because if they don't, physical contact will result with the threat of injury? I guess we should we feel bad that Ronaldo is missing 2-3 weeks with an ankle injury because he's an honest player. He's a guy that doesn't deserve such bad luck because he plays the game like a true professional with the utmost class. Hm...Exhibit B.

"I wouldn't be a hypocrite if I said that Cristiano is fouled very hard. And the yellow cards - or they aren't given or they arrive late."

Again, and this goes back to the pity issue above, Cristiano is treated unfairly by referees. You can't miss it. Kicked and kicked and kicked with no punishment handed out. And we should feel bad for him. It's not as though his pretty step overs, flicks, and tricks get under the skin of opponents. It's not as if other players see him as a show boater. They're out to get him because he's just so damn good. Senseless, mindless, and fouls of intent. I really feel bad for Cristiano. What has he ever done to deserve such rebuke?! - Exhibit C.

Rabbi Mourinho

Perhaps his personal note went something like this:

God,

We both know I am special. I am champion. People call me cocky, disrespectful, arrogant, narcissist. Can you strike lightning on them? It hurts my feelings. I have new job in Madrid - but I hate paella. What do I eat? Maybe you can send special meals to my home.

O no I am late for penis snipping! They ask me to mo'yel. Come to games, I give you seat beneath me.

I love you,

Jose

Finally, a worthy adversary

So Jose Mourinho is on his way to Spain. And in case you were wondering about Manuel Pellegrini, don't worry. Mr. Perez remembered he still had a manager and sacked him this afternoon. Let me digress for a moment to clarify something regarding the title of this very first blog of mine. I do not want anyone to think for a second that Pellegrini was not a worthy adversary. I have always respected and admired his managerial style especially with Villareal, where he implemented a Wenger-like, quick passing, possesion style of play. He brought Real Madrid to an unprecedented finish of 96 points. Going into the final day of the season, Real had won 18 of 19 games giving Barcelona no chance to slip up. But 2 losses to their arch rivals, and a 6th consecutive exit in the round of 16 in the Champions League buried any chance of his return. It wasn't enough, and in some ways, you always knew whatever he accomplished wouldn't be.