France sponsors want their money back - Part 2

As reported a little over a week ago, three of the main sponsors of the French national team were demanding compensation for the repulsive behavior of the team during the World Cup while donning their logos. As if that was not embarrassing enough, the situation has only worsened.

Now, everybody wants a piece of the FFF. All twelve of the team's sponsors have agreed on a payment scale in which "there will be bonuses and penalties based on results and image," according to FFF vice-president Noel Le Graet. The sponsors can reward a 10-15% bonus if the team starts winning games and, in the process, conducts themselves like normal, civilized, human beings. If not, they will reduce their contributions by the same amount.

Does this not hark back to your childhood? I remember my mother offering me cookies and sweets when I behaved well. Obviously, time-out in the corner resulted from being a brat. This is exactly what has transpired in France, and it is so pathetic yet hilarious all at once.

If you act like a baby, you'll be treated like one. Come to think of it, I'd throw lots of money behind a Toddler XI to beat this current French squad any day of the week. Then the sponsors would pull the plug on France and the new fad in world football would be Pampers!

It could happen ya know...

More trouble with the French squad

There is never a dull moment in the soap opera that is French football. This time it involves two well-known trouble makers - Karim Benzema and Lass Diarra. The Real Madrid duo arrived late to Clairefontaine where the French team is preparing for European qualifiers against Romania and Luxemburg. This came after Laurent Blanc had already postponed the deadline twice.

Blanc was understandably furious with both players who claimed to have missed their flight. He didn't buy it:

"If you miss your flight from another country, you will obviously be late. We are professionals and therefore must make sure we arrive on time for any flight. Benzema did not play in Real Madrid's match over the weekend, so there's no reason he should have arrived late."

Poor Blanc - a proven and successful manager who will no doubt bring the French team back to glory at some point. But not with these classless bums at his disposal. They have zero respect for the manager, the squad, or the institution. Self indulgence and individualism seem to be their only virtues.

When asked if the two would be sanctioned, the manager responded by saying:

"We already have players suspended. We're not going to throw stones at our own house."

HA!! In other words, he unfortunately has no choice but to play the pair since France has limited options and CANNOT afford to lose either of these games. Otherwise, it seems like he probably would have sent them home. And the last thing Blanc needs is more turmoil to tear apart the French team as he tries to rebuild it.

France sponsors want their money back

The principal sponsors of the French Football Federation (FFF) - Adidas, GDF Suez, and Crédit Agricole - are pissed off at the French World Cup team. Most sponsors expect their clients to represent them with professionalism, dignity, and integrity. Unfortunately, none of those endearing qualities can be attributed to any of the 23 men in South Africa over the summer.

Now, the three sponsors would like to be reimbursed to the tune of €4.5 million (I'm surprised it's not more) for unwillingly being the face of the French insurrection. This marks the very first time a country's major sponsors have asked for compensation of their investment.

A spokesman for GDF Suez issued the following remarks:

"We are outraged by what has happened. It is a lack of respect for everyone, and something we have never seen before. We well henceforth examine all contracts [with the FFF] through 2014. We cannot ignore what has happened here, as it is very serious. The French team have completely defaced the sport and their country."

Tell us how you really feel. If I were them, I'd completely pull out of the deal completely. Adidas is doing pretty without this, as are the other two major corporations. And if they aren't, find a different team since nobody in their right mind is clearing time on their schedules to watch the French national team compete. You're probably getting less exposure with that team than you would with Slovenia or Lichtenstein.

French airline offers Ribery prostitute discount

Passengers on Corsair were offered an end of summer deal - buy one ticket and get the second 50% off. In fact, one of these exclusive coupons was named after Franck [Ribery] and his 18 year old sex pal, Zahia (prostitute not included). The coupons read as mock quotes from four different couples, saying the following:

"For that price, I'd take Zahia" - Franck

So if I use that coupon, does that ensure a prostitute will be seated next to me? Or does it mean I'm the prostitute flying to a client? Corsair is the airlines on which Ribery flew the now famous escort to meet him in Munich for evenings, and afternoons and mornings I would imagine, of scarface passion. Not a bad marketing ploy at all.

The airlines has since removed the advertisement and France's most overrated player is now demanding an apology. Fat chance buddy. Nobody owes you an apology for making light of your sex-capades with an underage girl. This is the price you pay for committing adultery. It sucks, but at least your wife hasn't filed for devorce yet!

If for some reason you forgot what Zahia looks like, or you want to be refreshed, take the jump.

You're BANNED!!

Some time ago, a couple of rotten fruit prompted a revolution and covert operations to unsettle the source of the problem. Defiance and manipulation attempted to disrupt Joe's fruit market in an effort to teach him a lesson of how to properly manage his product. Of course, peaches and plums aren't always the best comparison to real life drama, but in this instance their telling tale brings a shocking resemblance to recent events in France.

You could say Nicolas Anelka was the rotten peach during the World Cup. Perhaps Evra was the plum. Poor old Raymond Domenech was Joe. Just as Joe was targeted as the source of the bad tasting fruit, so too was Domenech accused of creating a bitter taste throughout the French camp in South Africa. "I don't make the peaches, I sell the peaches." Just like Joe, Domenech stood firm in his defense, and could never have anticipated the foul-mouthed vitriol Anelka spewed out of his mouth in the locker room, and the subsequent strike by the players.

At the end of the day though, just like Kramer and Jerry, the villains got what they deserved. "You're banned!!" Thus said Joe, and now says the French Football Federation.

In an official statement on their website today, the FFF handed down the following bans:

"Nicolas Anelka is sanctioned with an 18-game suspension from selection for the France team."

"A five-game suspension from selection for the France team has been issued to Patrice Evra."

"Franck Ribery will have to serve a three-game suspension."

"Jeremy Toulalan is punished with one-game suspension."

"The commission takes note of the explanation provided by Eric Abidal, who has not been sanctioned."

Wow. I couldn't be more pleased with this outcome. For Anelka, this spells the end of his international career playing for France. At 31, 18 matches covers at least 2-3 years leaving him an old fart when reinstatement is possible (assuming the manager even considers taking him back). Evra, as captain and ringleader of the summer shenanigans, should have received more in my mind. Although 5 still rules him out of a couple European Championship qualifiers and his absence will be felt.

All in all justice was served, and the most rotten of fruit will now wilt away on the sidelines. Nobody is bigger than club. And surely no one man or team is bigger than country.

The Future is Now

Congratulations to France who on Friday won the European U19 Championship in Caen over Spain by a score of 2-1. Dominated in the first half and trailing by a goal, the French came out a different team in the second half...at least after the first 4 minutes. The 3 before that included 2 guilt-edged chances for Spain who should have sealed the championship. However, France remained composed and equalized in the 49th minute against the run of play on a splendid goal from Gilles Sunu. France wouldn't let Spain play their game by pressuring and harassing anyone with the ball. It ultimately paid off as Alexandre Lacazette headed home the winner in the 85th minute to claim France's 7th championship.

Good for France. Seriously. After what happened at the World Cup, they deserved something to be proud of. 20,000 strong filled Stade Michel d'Ornano roaring on their home team with every touch. Any way you look at it, this was a breathe of fresh air for French football, and more importantly, it was the kids - the next generation - who did it.

How important is winning such a tournament? Perhaps only time will tell. These kids are still extremely young and have important years ahead in their development. Unfortunately, it is likely that many of the players will not feature for their clubs and national teams in the near future. They're still only between 17-19 years old. There is a slight exception to the rule though...

FIFA's Hypocrisy

I guess it was a only a matter of time before you heard this rant of mine. I was only waiting for a good opportunity to bring it up and in light of recent developments in France, this is a perfect time.

It revolves around football's relationship with governments - or rather their attempt to distance themselves from it. As I'm sure you all followed the disgraceful exit of France from the tournament, you no doubt heard that President Sarkozy asked for a review of French football and was even planning to meet with Thierry Henry to discuss the Nicolas Anelka fiasco. Not surprisingly, big bad FIFA intervened the other day and has warned the French government of interfering with football affairs with the risk of being thrown out of future tournaments.

FIFA's stance is quite simple - government and football are separate, independent entities. Article 13.1.(g) of FIFA's laws explains that national federations are obliged "to manage their affairs independently and ensure that their own affairs are not influenced by any third parties." The laws go on to dictate that third parties, "include politicians, governments, states, media, etc." As the governing body for world football, these laws pertain to the continental confederations as well.