Perhaps his personal note went something like this:
God,
We both know I am special. I am champion. People call me cocky, disrespectful, arrogant, narcissist. Can you strike lightning on them? It hurts my feelings. I have new job in Madrid - but I hate paella. What do I eat? Maybe you can send special meals to my home.
O no I am late for penis snipping! They ask me to mo'yel. Come to games, I give you seat beneath me.
I love you,
Jose
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